Chapter 2: Finding support
From people that you know
One sister-in-law had had a miscarriage about the same time as I did. My other sister-in-law had had five miscarriages before they had their two children. It was so good to recover with family around, and to be able to talk to people who could understand what I was going through.
Below are some ideas and suggestions for trying to get support from people you know. Click on each section.
Think about what might or might not be helpful to you at this time.
Think about who can best support you. This might be one or two trusted family members or friends who are able to listen and be with you as needed.
Ask someone to check in regularly with you, even if you don’t feel like talking or having company.
Ask your employer, healthcare provider, a friend, or a family member to inquire on your behalf about bereavement leave, Employment Insurance (EI) benefits, or other benefits available to you through your provincial or territorial government.
Your co-workers can support you best when they know what you need. Whether or not they knew that you were pregnant, think about what you want or do not want them to know, and what you want or do not want to hear from them, either while you are off or when you return to work.
For example, you may want them to say nothing, or you may prefer an acknowledgement but no uninvited conversation. You may feel okay about more open discussion but want to provide them with a “helpful vs. unhelpful things to say” list.
If people living near you were aware of your pregnancy or witnessed emergency services visiting your home, you may want to prepare yourself for questions or expressions of concern.
If you have a trusted friend in your community, consider asking them to act as your spokesperson until you feel ready to speak with people yourself.
Helpful resources
