Chapter 3: Recognizing and responding to your grief
When your grief isn’t acknowledged
When my best buddy at work died, I found most people didn’t get it. It was like, “What’s the big deal?” But every day I went to work, I missed him.Sometimes other people don’t recognize how a loss is impacting you. They might say things that feel insensitive or hurtful. For example, someone might question why you are feeling so sad or “still struggling.” This can leave you feeling confused, isolated, and more distressed.
Click on the arrows below for some thoughts and feelings that may arise:
You might not feel that you have the “right” to be grieving.
You might wonder if there is something wrong with you.
You might think you aren’t welcome to attend the funeral, memorial service, or other gathering.
While nothing can change what has happened, it’s important that you acknowledge your grief and have it acknowledged by others.
What may help
- Remind yourself that your grief is real and deserves your attention.
- Seek out supportive people who will listen to you with compassion and patience.
- Make time to talk with your healthcare provider or a grief counsellor.
- Consider journaling or writing about your grief. Guided journals with specific grief prompts are available through online resources or bookstores.